| Course | HCA 130 Healthcare Writing and Communications |
|---|---|
| Module | Module 5 |
| Paper type | Professional messages paper |
| Length | About 1,044 words, 6 pages |
| Format | APA 7 student paper |
| School | Aspen University |
| Program | Health Care Administration |
| Updated | September 2026 |
Free sample paper for HCA 130 Module 5
Lead With the Ask: Writing Professional Email and Messages to Colleagues
Student Name
Health Care Administration Program, Aspen University
HCA 130: Healthcare Writing and Communications
Instructor Name
Month Day, Year
Lead With the Ask: Writing Professional Email and Messages to Colleagues
Much of the communication among health care workers happens in writing: email between departments, messages in the record system's inbox and notes passed between shifts. Poorly written messages waste time, delay care and create friction. This paper sets out principles for professional messages and applies them to three composite drafts from a family clinic, showing each original and its revision.
The Reader's Inbox
Colleagues read messages among many others. In a multispecialty practice, physicians received an average of 243 in-basket messages a week, of which 114 were generated by the record system, 53 came from colleagues and 30 from patients; physicians who received more than the average number of system messages had a 40% higher probability of burnout (Tai-Seale et al., 2019). Every message a writer sends competes for attention, so it must be easy to understand and act on.
Principles
Five principles guide professional messages. Put the request or main point in the first sentence. Write a subject line that says what the message is about and what is needed. Include only the details the reader needs to act. Make the deadline and next step explicit. Keep the tone courteous and neutral, even when frustrated.
Draft One: A Buried Request
A front desk lead wrote to the billing office: Hi, hope your week is going well. We have had a lot of patients asking about their bills lately, especially since the new statements started going out, and some of them are confused about the amounts. Mrs. D. came in yesterday and was upset. I told her someone would call. Could you maybe call her? Thanks. The request, a call to a specific patient, appears only at the end, without a phone number, account number or deadline.
Revision One
Subject: Please call patient about statement by Friday. Could someone in billing call Mrs. D. (account number in the record) by Friday about her June statement? She is unsure why the balance is higher than her copay and was upset at the front desk yesterday. Her preferred phone number is in her chart. Separately, several patients have asked about the new statement format; I can share their questions if it would help. The revision states the request, the patient, the deadline and the issue in the first two sentences, and separates the broader concern.
Draft Two: A Vague Clinical Message
A medical assistant sent a physician a record message: Mr. K. called, not feeling well, wants to know what to do. The physician had to open the chart, call the assistant and ask questions before deciding anything.
Revision Two Using SBAR
SBAR, which stands for situation, background, assessment and recommendation, gives clinical messages a predictable order. Reviewers who pooled eleven studies of SBAR judged the evidence of safer care as moderate, with the clearest gains when the format organized phone calls between nurses and physicians (Müller et al., 2018). The revised message read: Situation: Mr. K., 71, called at 10:15 with dizziness since this morning. Background: Started amlodipine 10 mg last week for blood pressure. Assessment: Home blood pressure 96/58, no chest pain, no falls, speaking clearly. Request: Please advise whether to hold amlodipine and whether he needs a same-day visit. He is waiting by the phone.
Draft Three: The Reply-All Complaint
After a scheduling mix-up, a staff member replied to an all-staff email with: This is the THIRD time this month the schedule has been wrong. Can someone PLEASE fix it?? The message used capital letters, implied blame and went to 40 people, most of whom could not fix the problem.
Revision Three
The revised message went only to the office manager: Subject: Schedule errors this month, request to discuss. Three times this month, patients were booked into slots already filled for Dr. Rivera, on June 3, 10 and 17. Could we meet this week to look at the template? I can bring the details. The revision moves the concern to the person who can act, gives specific facts and proposes a next step, without blame.
Subject Lines
The table shows subject lines before and after revision.
| Before | After |
|---|---|
| Question | Need prior authorization form for Mr. S. by Thursday |
| Update | New fax number for cardiology starts July 1 |
| FYI | No action needed: June no-show rates attached |
| Help!! | Printer in Room 3 down; patient labels printing at front desk |
Privacy in Messages
Regular email is not the right channel for patient details unless the organization's system is secure and approved for that use. Messages about patients belong in the record system's secure messaging, and staff should include the minimum information needed, such as a reference to the chart rather than a diagnosis in a subject line. The HIPAA Privacy Rule's minimum necessary standard applies to internal communications as well as to disclosures outside the practice (U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 2022).
Tone Under Pressure
Messages written in frustration are often regretted. A simple rule is to wait before sending anything written while upset, reread it as the recipient would and remove capital letters, multiple punctuation marks and words such as always and never. Facts and a proposed solution carry more weight than emotion.
When Not to Write
Some matters should not be handled in writing at all. Urgent clinical concerns need a phone call or a direct conversation. Sensitive personnel issues belong in a private meeting. A long back-and-forth thread is often a sign that a five-minute conversation would be faster.
Replying Well
Good replies matter as much as good first messages. A reply should answer every question asked, in the order asked, and say clearly when something is done. Closing the loop, such as Called Mrs. D. at 2:10 and explained the balance, lets the sender stop tracking the task. Replies that say only thanks or will do leave the sender unsure whether the task is complete.
Conclusion
Professional messages respect the reader's time by leading with the request, using clear subject lines, including only what is needed and keeping a calm tone. The three rewrites show how a buried request, a vague clinical message and a reply-all complaint became messages that a colleague could act on immediately. In an environment of overflowing inboxes, clear messages are a form of teamwork.
References
Müller, M., Jürgens, J., Redaèlli, M., Klingberg, K., Hautz, W. E., & Stock, S. (2018). Impact of the communication and patient hand-off tool SBAR on patient safety: A systematic review. BMJ Open, 8(8), Article e022202. https://doi.org/10.1136/bmjopen-2018-022202
Tai-Seale, M., Dillon, E. C., Yang, Y., Nordgren, R., Steinberg, R. L., Nauenberg, T., Lee, T. C., Meehan, A., Li, J., Chan, A. S., & Frosch, D. L. (2019). Physicians' well-being linked to in-basket messages generated by algorithms in electronic health records. Health Affairs, 38(7), 1073-1078. https://doi.org/10.1377/hlthaff.2018.05509
U.S. Department of Health and Human Services. (2022). Summary of the HIPAA privacy rule. https://www.hhs.gov/hipaa/for-professionals/privacy/laws-regulations/index.html
Reading the HCA 130 Module 5 assignment instructions
The HCA 130 catalog listing covers communication specific to health care work, and with the module's own prompt visible only after enrollment, workplace email and messages fit this example. Assignments on professional messages usually ask you to write or revise emails for given situations and explain your choices, sometimes including a message to a clinician. Check whether your prompt supplies drafts to revise or asks you to write from scratch. If it includes a clinical message, use a structured format such as SBAR. Keep all patient details fictional, and show the subject line for each message, since graders read it as part of the writing. Label each message clearly as original or revised.
How this HCA 130 Module 5 example is built
This sample contains about 1,035 words across fifteen headings, with a subject line table. It opens with inbox volume data and five principles. Each of three drafts appears in full, followed by its revision and an explanation: the buried request, the vague clinical message rewritten in SBAR with evidence from a systematic review, and the reply-all complaint. The subject line table shows four before-and-after pairs. Privacy and the minimum necessary rule, tone under pressure, when not to write and how to reply well complete the body, and one side note tells why the inbox figures come first. The conclusion describes clear messages as a form of teamwork. Every rewrite is followed by a sentence naming what changed.
HCA 130 Module 5 rubric: what earns full marks
Message-writing assignments tend to be graded on clarity of purpose, appropriate content, tone and professionalism, and privacy awareness. Each revision here states the request in its first sentence and adds the deadline or next step. Content is trimmed to what the reader needs. Tone is courteous even in the complaint rewrite. Privacy appears in the channel choice and minimum necessary content. A study of physician inboxes, a systematic review of SBAR and federal privacy guidance are cited and listed in APA style. Graders favor papers that show messages in full before and after, as this one does. Clear labels for each draft and revision also help graders follow the paper.
HCA 130 Module 5 help: mistakes that cost marks
The most common weakness is a message that makes the reader search for the request. Put it in the first sentence and the subject line. Students also include too much background or, in clinical messages, too little: vital signs, medicines and a specific question matter. Another gap is ignoring privacy by putting diagnoses in subject lines or regular email. Remove capital letters and extra punctuation. If you want your emails or SBAR message checked before submitting, our tutors can review them and tell you whether a busy reader would know what to do. Ask yourself whether the reader could act without opening a single attachment. Also check that your reply to any message answers every question asked.
Write yours, or have the desk draft it
This paper is an original model document written by our desk, not a submitted student paper and not an official Aspen University document. Read it for the moves, then write your own to the instructions in your classroom. If you want one built to your exact prompt and rubric, the first custom sample is free and arrives in 24 to 48 hours.
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HCA 130 Module 5 questions, answered
What does HCA 130 Module 5 usually ask for?
The HCA 130 description covers communication in health care fields, so writing and revising professional emails is a typical assignment. Check your Aspen classroom for the prompt.
What is SBAR?
A format for clinical messages: situation, background, assessment and recommendation, which puts information in a predictable order.
What makes a good email subject line?
It states the topic and what is needed, such as a request and deadline, so the reader knows what to do before opening it.
Where can I find a free HCA 130 Module 5 sample paper?
This page carries the whole professional email paper, three rewrites, subject line table and margin notes. It is the fifth of eight HCA 130 samples.
When should I call instead of writing in HCA 130 Module 5?
For urgent clinical concerns, sensitive personnel matters or any issue that has turned into a long back-and-forth thread.